💼 Now recruiting: Mid-Level Crisis Consultants (no prior stability required).
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Senior Analyst of Overthinking Operations T-Shirt

$17.28

Position Overview:
If you've ever rewritten a text 17 times just to say “okay,” or replayed a 3-second interaction from 2014 before falling asleep - congrats, you're qualified. This shirt is the official uniform of those who run mental simulations with the intensity of a high-stakes strategy board.

Key Duties Include:

  • Creating at least 3 alternate outcomes for every social interaction
  • Strategically second-guessing every decision, even the good ones
  • Leading crisis drills for imaginary scenarios that will never happen
  • Daily audits of tone, punctuation, and perceived weirdness in every message sent

Core Competencies:
✔️ Advanced Hypothetical Forecasting
✔️ Mastery in Social Autopsy Reports
✔️ Fluent in both “What did they really mean?” and “Was that weird?”
✔️ High-functioning with Impostor Syndrome add-on enabled

Select Size

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More details

  • 100% cotton
  • 100% cotton
  • Sport Grey is 90% cotton, 10% polyester
  • Ash Grey is 99% cotton, 1% polyester
  • Heather colors are 50% cotton, 50% polyester
  • Midweight fabric (5 oz)
  • Regular fit
  • Pre-shrunk jersey knit

Size & Fit

View size chart

Quality Guarantee & Returns

  • Quality is guaranteed. If there is a print error or visible quality issue, we'll replace or refund it.
  • Because the products are made to order, we do not accept general returns or sizing-related returns.

Senior Analyst of Overthinking Operations T-Shirt Size Guide

Size guide preview
Size label Length Width Sleeve length
S
28
18
15.63
M
29
20
17
L
30
22
18 1/2
XL
31
24
20
2XL
32
26
21 1/2
3XL
33
28
22.8
4XL
34
30
24.2
5XL
35
32
25.3

Our suppliers provide the measurements. There may be a deviation of up to 2 inches (5 cm) in the product dimensions.

A useful tip! Compare measurements with a product you already own at home by measuring it and matching it to the sizes in this guide.

A Length

Start the tape at the collar's top next to the shirt's highest point on the shoulder. Extend the tape to the shirt's bottom.

B Width

Begin at the seam just under one sleeve and extend the tape across to the seam under the other sleeve.

C Sleeve length

Start measuring from the back center of the collar, follow the top seam of the sleeve to the shoulder, secure the tape at the shoulder, and continue down to the end of the sleeve.